Xiao Mao must be wishing I have loads of money to buy loads of cat food!

I think I am losing my coherence. My posts are all in short and brief sentences. Unlike in the past, I was able to blabber on and on in huge paragraphs.

I think I have lost of gift of bitching. Perhaps its time I grew up. :x

Nowadays, I am hardly angry at any tiny thing. Good thing, really. Now my head can be used for the greater things in life. Bigger arguments. (haha)

I thought my previous post was really distasteful. Maybe this is the problem with virgos. We think too much and we leave many things unsaid till the breaking point. Which makes us appear as really problematic people.

Definitely it made me feel better letting things out. Thanks weiwei for listening. I must have been a damn scary person. HAha.

Also, I found such posts can make people tag! Saucy juicy news eh? Enough of crap, I should not be abusing people's concern and taking them for granted. Thank you people...

My Xiao Mao is growing well. I think I should call it Bishop. Simply because it looks like one. Chim name I feel.. and rather difficult to call for it to sound cute.

Question for the day: " Where do you see yourself five years down the road?"

Because what you do today will be where you are heading 5 years later. Do you see yourself where you wanna be, and are you doing the things which leads you where you wanna go?

Anyone who has a heart

Why do you have that special somebody in your heart?

I can't feel my heart. Sometimes I realise I've got no heart. I do not have anything. While people can have the one person they love in there, I found my own to be empty.

Why?

I also wonder why I'm not able to be anybody's special someone.

It would be a real blessing to know that someone keeps a special place for you.

I do not have that good fortune.

I realise the desireable men that I have met, their hearts are occupied already.

(Desireable does not just include good looks.. rich dads.. fast cars..I mean genuinely good people.)

I am sadden.

Why am I not that kind of woman to receive such good grace.

Things don't always turns out the way you want them to be.

What will it take me to replace that person in your heart?

Sometimes I thought if I were to find the right person, I would give my all to take that person's place.

But on retrospect, I would always be a substitute, second to what was initially there.

And not to mention, I would be psychotic.

Many a times, I pictured myself leading a life on my own.

Things I desire seems to be taken already.

I'm in a circumstance where I am not free to do what I want.

I can only see you behind a wall of glass, and I can't break that wall.

Shattering that wall would mean shattering you.

Sick

My year started real lousy.. I found myself sick in the first two months more often than any three years combined before 2006. What is happening to me!?

Today I got diahorrea.. this same thing happened last week on tuesday.. before cny I was down with a cold.. then I lost my voice. Argh..

Then a few nights back I had a really freakish dream.. I dreamt that I was in the washroom, washing my hands at the sink and I found myself bleeding really badly. Blood was oozing out from my wrist.. but strangely I couldn't see the wound and felt no pain.. But blood was all over the place. Then I looked up into the mirror and saw that I had sunken cheeks, complexion really grey. I look dead. Argh.. freakish..

I remember I was in a white robe.. but stained with blood (wrist continues bleeding).. I walked out of the washroom and walked to somewhere I thought was like a restaurant. Then everyone turned and gasped,"OMG, what happened to her?"

I stood there for a moment or two, still wondering what exactly has happened to me... then I woke up.

When I opened my eyes, I felt a little restrained.. couldn't really move my body.. spasm.

I kept praying and praying after that. I dunno what my dream means. Maybe its just some horror movie that I've seen or I am self-mutilating.. sigh.. maybe I'm just really stressed and drained.

Time

I have been urged to change the layout of my blog, or rather, to finish it.

You see, time is a precious commodity.

I'm so tied up with commitments in school and out of. I'm so busy I hardly have the time to breathe!

For a moment I wanted to revert back to the blog templates provided by blogger. The simplier they are the more pleasing. And entries look good on them too. User friendly and navigation is smooth. I am so r-e-s-i-s-t-i-n-g the urge to change it to the custom templates.

I guess I will stick with these. I didn't spend that 5 mins on Photoshop for nothing. Much less to say, another 30 mins on the positioning of all those links.

I could only wish I have more than 24 hours in a day....

By far the most interesting thing that happened this week:


The main purpose of this photo was to try out the "big head small head" effect as suggested by my little brother. I thought this was a really nice photo despite my plastic smile and awfully "kok" plastic frames, and my (skinny) brother's double chin.

I used the same picture on msn and everyone I talked to asked if that's my boyfriend. Haha. Of the many comments, one said.. "hmm.. quite yandao"... and another.. "quite chio"... (head swells)... I guess it runs in the family...